April 3rd, 2014

naked

The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: Decide what you want.

I'm kinda in a standstill with myself. And I don't know what to do.

The other day while sitting outside with my Grandpa he looked at me and said, "Why don't you go to school. Go to Erwin, learn something you can do to get a job. I'll pay for half of it if you Mom does. But you have to ask her." Well I did and she; like I thought she would be; was pissed off at the idea of it. So I thought that was the end of it. But it turned out that it wasn't. She told me today and if I was going to do this and if she was going to help pay for it then I need to do something that I want. To either return to ITT and finish my degree or go to HCC and get a two year degree. She said, that while in school they could help me with finding a job and that in turn would allow me to pay for the classes myself.

I was little taken aback by her saying that. In fact last night I was looking at HCC's catalog at the Computer degree's they offer. If given a choice I would love to take either Computer Information Administrator or Computer Programing. And now it looks like I just might get to do this. But should I do it? Grandpa would have to cash in some of his stock to do this and Mom would be eating into her Reno budget for the house. Is it really fair of me to take this knowing that I screwed up the first go around?

I'm going to go and talk to the people at HCC before I make a decision. But I am still very torn.
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    contemplative
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